My First Day of Therapy

Therapy was intense.  The first week I was in therapy for 4 hours of an 8 hour day.  Each session would be 30 minutes long.  I would have three sessions of physical therapy, three sessions of occupational therapy, one session of recreational therapy, and one session of speech therapy.  I would get an hour for lunch.  Occupational therapy focused on my fine motor skills of my left hand and right eye.  Physical therapy focused on my balance and movement.  Recreational therapy focused on both of those but through playing games and doing things I enjoy.  Speech therapy focused on speech but also memory and cognitive functioning.

By Saturday, I graduated from speech therapy.  It was quickly realized that my memory and cognitive functioning had not been impaired.  I was still "me."  They did inform me of my right side facial droop and gave me exercises to help it.

My therapy team was nothing short of amazing.   They were all young and athletic and just fit with my attitude.  They knew where I was coming from and where I wanted and needed to go.  You will read MUCH about them in upcoming posts.

My first day of OT was a testing day.  First, my OT assessed my vision and sensory awareness.  My vision was out of control.  It was like looking through a kaleidoscope.  I had no idea which image was the "actual" image so I never looked at someone straight on even though I thought I was!  It was clear though.  My vision in each eye and even when both eyes work together has remained 20/20.  My ability to read off a set of numbers in order was also reasonably intact.  Other than multiple images, my main deficit was tracking and peripheral vision.  My right eye would not move past mid-line.  It would literally bounce when it hit mid-line.  I could not track an object all the way to the right as a result.  As you can imagine, my vision caused crazy nausea.  For the first two weeks I relied heavily on nausea medication.  The crazy thing was that if I just closed one eye, it didn't matter which one, I would see perfectly fine.  One image only and clear.

My sensory input was also significantly impaired.  My left arm felt like a tree trunk laced with nails.  It was stiff, heavy, and felt HUGE even though it looked completely normal.  Anytime anyone or anything would touch me I would experience intense cold and tingling.  I was hypersensitive, but yet I couldn't feel specific touch.  If something was poking me, I couldn't tell you where or what.  If I was holding something, I couldn't tell you I even was gripping it let alone what size, shape, or texture it was.  I couldn't tell if my arm was covered by a blanket or if I had long sleeves on.  Shoot, I couldn't even tell when a blood pressure cuff would tighten around my arm!  Finally, I could not mimic movement.  My OT would have me close my eyes.  She would then move my left arm and hand in to a certain position and ask me to copy it with my right.  I could mimic the significant ones, like if she raised my arm up or out.  But I could not even begin to tell you if my thumb was up or down or if my palm was facing up or down.  It was literally like my arm was not connected to my body.

In addition to sensory awareness I was tested on strength and fine motor movement.  I had to grip a pressure machine in a variety of ways.  I couldn't tell if I was squeezing it let alone how hard.  I also had to do the 9 hole peg test.  I affectionately call this my nemesis.  It is a rectangular plastic blue tray about 12" long and 6" wide with a shallow dish on the left side carved in to it.  On the right side is a 3 x 3 grid of 9 holes.  The pegs are white plastic cylinders about an inch long and as think as a screw.  Everything is slippery to the touch which is terrible for someone who can't function. All 9 pegs were placed in the dish.  I had to pick up one peg at a time and put it in a hole.  After I had all nine in there, I had to take them out one by one and put them back in the dish.  This was a timed test. The first time I did it I couldn't pick one up.  My fingers wouldn't bend or work. It was literally like I was was just slapping them as they just went all over the table.  The only way I could do it was if my OT handed them to me one by one.  But they had to be handed to me in the exact way that I needed so that I could put them in the hole.  I had NO in hand manipulation.  I would have to move my entire arm or body in crazy positions to place things the way I needed to.  I did it that first day with assistance in 3 minutes 45 seconds.  That was after three times of trying.

I will never forget how I felt in those moments.  It was the first time I had really tried to pick something up.  I had no idea I was that bad.  I was in utter disbelief.  I had a split second where  I wanted to stop.  I wanted to cry.  I wanted to just quit.  But then "I" kicked in.  What I mean is, my fight, my positivity, my ability to accept and overcome, my "I won't be beat!" kicked in.  I wasn't going to let this beat me when I had just beat the hardest thing I had ever done.  Not now, not ever.  So, I accepted it and told myself I would do better next time.

My left leg and foot were the same as my arm and hand.  I tilted to the left because I felt so heavy.  I could not tell how much pressure I was putting on my leg so I never trusted that it would hold me up. PT was spent working on balance and relearning how to teach my brain how to flex muscles that straightened my leg or supported my leg.

Now combine my sensory and balance deficit with my vision.  Nightmare!  Since I saw a million different images it always took me a few times to even find the actual object to pick up.  I couldn't look down or side to side without getting nauseous so when I did PT it was hard to step over or around things when I basically had to guess where the objects I were to maneuver around even were!  Just try walking around once without moving your head--not easy!

My mountains were high and many.  I would look up at times and be overwhelmed.  However I knew that I would never get better if I didn't pull up my big girl pants and step up to the challenge.  God had already given me a second chance so I owed it to Him, to my family, and to myself to give it everything I had.

The video below is of my first PT session.  I had to balance on both knees and catch a ball.  I also had to balance on each knee separately and catch a ball.  All of these tasks were ridiculously challenging. I was fatigued from my stroke but I also tired extremely quickly.  Anytime I got physically tired my left side would tingle more intently and become even more heavy.  After 30 seconds of doing this my butt and legs would feel like I just did 100 goblet squats with 45's in a row  This was a tough pill to swallow when some of my main physical strengths were muscular endurance and leg strength..



Facebook post from Patrick on October 31, 2013

Playing a little catch!!  We have settled into our comfy room here at Covenant.  Looking forward to watching my wife continue to progress by the minute!!  Occupational therapy already done and she is in the midst of her first PT of the day!!!