Christmas Celebrations!

Christmas was already upon us.  It is my absolute favorite time of the year.  This Christmas was even more special because of what all of us had been through as families.  After we had finished our family celebrations I couldn't help but express what my husband and little ladies meant to me.

Facebook post from December 22, 2013

There have been many times in the last few days especially when Patrick has turned to me and said, "I am so glad you are here." To which I respond poorly with, "Me too." There are many reasons and people whom I am grateful for that make me so glad I am here, but I think my reasons can best be summed up as I have explained below.

1. There is nothing quite like watching Patrick sit with all three girls on his lap as they belt out the Strawberry Shortcake theme song. It is moments like these where I not only realize how much I love him, but also how much I absolutely adore him. Patrick constantly reminds me that loving another in this life is truly a sacred blessing.

2. Seeri randomly started a conversation with me the other day about blood vessels and their job in your body. After her explanation, she matter-of-factory stated, "and that is why I think you will be better by January Mom." The comment made me laugh and made my heart smile all at once. Seeri is always my biggest cheerleader. She reminds me to believe in myself, in others, and in my faith.

3, A couple of weeks ago I was getting Jaelyn ready for bed. I was looking in the mirror trying to focus so hard on straightening my eye as she went to the bathroom. When she finished she so proudly informed me that, "girls have giants and boys have peanuts!" I laughed so hard--it was the first time I had laughed that hard in a month. Jaelyn always makes me laugh. She reminds me to smile, laugh, be silly, and enjoy life.

4. I always greet Linden by saying "Hi baby!" with my arms outstretched ready for a hug. Recently, she has begun to say "Hi baby!" back to me in perfect impersonation of my voice. It is seriously the cutest thing. Linden is at the age where she will repeat everything you say and do. She reminds me that my girls are watching everything I do. If nothing else, I hope that they are proud of what I am showing them.

5. And then there is little Pajamie. I have been trying as of late to enjoy my pregnancy with her a bit more. As I mentioned in one if my earlier posts, my mind used to race during the quiet times. I now try to focus in on her a bit more instead. I love the times where I just settle in with my partner in crime and let her carry on with her own little kickboxing workout. I think Pajamie and I are working our way through our own little miracle together. She reminds me how fragile, precious, and beautiful life really is.

I am just a few days under the two month anniversary of my stroke. So much has happened during that time. I often feel like I am having an out of body experience. For example, when I watched the video from the Next Level potluck I thought, "that is such a sad story and I feel so bad for her husband and family." Then, I came to and realized that they were talking about me, my story, and that was my husband. I am that sad story. I feel this way when I talk about my experience, or show someone my physical restrictions, or my eye. I hear myself recount the story, I watch my hand fumble, and see my crooked eye, but it is like I am watching myself tell it....like there is two of me. The stroke Jamie and the regular Jamie. It is a weird thing when your mind is strong but your body doesn't want to keep up.

The fact is, I don't want to be a sad story. Yes, having a stroke sucked BAD. But, even though I naturally have some worry, I am really proud of what I have accomplished and feel optimistic about my future and Pajamie's future. I don't have room for pity, fear, worry, or the I'm sorries from others. I need strength, positivity, and encouragement. I want my story to be one of overcoming; overcoming with grace, strength, and positivity.

I wish you all a Christmas and New Year filled with happiness, love, and many blessings. Thank you for your continued support and encouragement as my family and I battle our way through this journey. We love you all and you will be in our prayers. 

Patrick and I had agreed not to give each other gifts for Christmas.  Or so I thought!  Of course, he surprised me with this amazing personalized book, with the help of the amazingly talented, Sara Fitzgerald.  The artwork on the front cover was created by her and she took creative control over the inside.  The inside of the book contains all of my posts and pictures from Facebook up to that point.  I lost it when I opened it.  I was just so floored that he had thought so much about this gift and that Sara had donated her time.  It means the world to me and I often cuddle up with it during the day when I need a pick-me-up. 


Facebook post from December 25, 2013

My AMAZING Christmas gift from my AMAZING husband. I will hold this book close to my heart forever.

For our family pictures this year we all dressed in our "Do Better.  Be Better." shirts.  My family wore the black ones that were sold by my school and NLXF.  Patrick's family wore red ones that were created by the amazingly talented, Heather Rausch only for our immediate families.  Patrick's family surprised me with these the morning of our Christmas celebration.  Once again, I cried.  

Garbes Family Pictures

Our Funny Face Picture!

Smith Family Pictures

Our Funny Face Picture!